Taking time to reflect, remember, and recommit – year end thoughts

The following notes are my end-of-year reflections, which I sent to people who subscribed to receive that from me. I think they may be useful for prompting your own reflections, ahead of the next Metacrisis Meeting, so am posting them here as well. Wishing you bright times in the year ahead, no matter the darker stuff that surrounds . Thx! Jem

When I look back on a year I don’t just consider what I experienced, contributed and accomplished. I always wonder what I have learned, and how I want to apply that in future. I had that in mind recently when I was interviewed by the e-zine Grist. One of their journalists is aware that the creeping collapse of societies has become a more credible framing amongst both experts and members of the public. She was interested in what can happen from such an awareness. So she asked how that awareness has shaped me over the years, and what’s been changing. I realised my own journey might help you with your own reflections, so I wrote them up for this personal newsletter that I send out twice a year… 

Becoming collapse-aware doesn’t mean the process of collapse suddenly concludes around us. Like me, most of you reading these words are fortunate enough not to be living in destitution. We live in the society as we find it, with our identities, assets, skills, networks, responsibilities and desires — which have built up over time within that society. So with collapse awareness, or even collapse acceptance, there are many types of response.

Some people drop everything and change what they do and where they live. 

Others postpone any decisions or life changes. 

Others try to transition in a gradual way to a new way of life, not shaped by their previous assumptions and aspirations. 

Others try to create options, perhaps a Plan B, while they continue with the Plan A of their lives, perhaps with a little less relish and some growing dissonance. 

Others decide to make no changes and live the same way but with an added awareness, gratitude and sensitivity. 

In Chapter 12 of my book Breaking Together, I provided examples of what people are doing to deeply adapt. I called such people doomsters, myself included. To make this ‘upside’ of collapse awareness more widely available, we just released a video of the audiobook chapter. Matthew’s narration is easy on the ear and Ezca did a lovely job with the images, so I recommend it to you for an hour over the holiday period. 

But back to those questions from the Grist journalist. I chose to live with my collapse awareness in four main ways.

1. Relocating home. I chose to live in a country that might offer me quality of life for longer, as well as more options with my financial means. Indonesia offered that to me. For various reasons I consider it a country that could avoid some of the worst disruptions. Some parts of the country are vulnerable, such as Sumatra, which recently experienced damage, as much due to the greedy destruction of its forests as from the changing climate. Apart from that, there is a moderation of temperatures and precipitation by seas and mountains, and an absence of typhoons, across most of the archipelago. That’s as well as volcanic soils, and so many natural resources, that it doesn’t depend on international supply chains. 
2. Refocusing employment. I quit any paid work that didn’t seem like it would be offering my best intellectual contribution to others. Instead, I worked on projects to connect people on this topic, to support their leadership and communication, and provide them with insight through a book and blog series. 
3. Reducing expectations. I changed some of my habits and ambitions, to reduce both potential expenditure and earning requirements, to enable more time for both spiritual and creative exploration and expression. That meant I could become a musician, to write, perform, produce and release music, as well as co-host meditation retreats. 
4. Resilience seeking. I started a local project that might offer some personal resilience while contributing to wider resilience and also pursuing near-term ecosocial goals. That is Bekandze Farm, a regenerative farming training centre. 

Now, some years later, the first two shifts remain the same. I am grateful for where I live, despite it being far from some friends and family. I’ve continued with my refocused employment, and feel some pride for the way the book is influencing people around the world. That inspired me to launch the Metacrisis Meetings Initiative. We meet every month for an online salon, and in the new year we launch a peer mentoring programme for people wanting to live a positive response to our predicament. Membership is open to anyone who is collapse aware. Also, if you are younger than 34, live in the Majority World, work on social or environmental issues, and perceive the unfolding metacrisis, then you can apply to join us with a free membership. Otherwise, please forward this to someone who might benefit… and consider a paid membership, as that funds us to offer those freebies. 

Reducing expectations, that third shift, is a constant challenge, as I so easily allow myself to get too busy with work. I am pleased that in 2025 I gave more time to playing at kirtans and writing mantras, which embraced various wisdom traditions. I released a video that captures one moment and one mantra I wrote, during the Feast of Mary Magdalene. This creative turn also led to me using my capabilities as a thinker and writer in a different way — to produce a deck of oracle cards for challenging times. I’m delighted to see friends finding them useful already. 

However, my life has changed a bit, as I’ve responded to the costs of maintaining the farm school, of music production, and some more family responsibilities. So I returned to the expectation of earning some money! I want to be able to do more than living frugally off my savings. Therefore, I charged membership fees for the MMI. That has brought a new structure to the way I will try to be of service to people who value my analysis. 

The fourth area, of seeking resilience locally, is where I have made little progress, and am currently reassessing what to do. In launching an organic farm school, I was naive about the financials, the market, and the risks, as well as my capacity and financial appetite. I am pleased with what we have achieved, through teaching over 60 farmers for free, many of whom are applying the approaches and showing others. I am grateful for all the people who worked with us over the last 3 years. Engaging with farmers, we identified why the organic sector is stuck in Bali, and what can change that. We made a powerful short film about the topic, which is reaching people and stimulating conversations. But the farm loses money, mine, and at some point next year I need to stop doing that. It appears that the only way we can have a viable business is to offer eco-agri-tourism, where people stay to experience our beautiful organic farm, help out, and cook together. To do that, we are looking for a new business partner with the funds and experience to make it work. However, as you know, anything involving tourism is not very collapse-ready! 

I have been wondering what I have learned, more generally, from this experience. Looking back, I realise I pursued what I considered an ethical ideal. I agreed with a friend that it is far better to try and promote wider resilience, rather than just our own, while also helping to address environmental issues in the short term. Instead, I could have focused more pragmatically on myself: how do I achieve some personal resilience to a partial collapse, rather than a full-scale breakdown? That would mean finding an income locally, not via international work, and not reliant on the visitor economy. How might I do that with a limited capital spend and time horizon? And how might I do it in a way that fits with the rest of my life and is somewhat enjoyable in itself? I could have been asking such questions as part of an integrated response to my assessment of what is happening in the world, without over-estimating my capabilities. I’m reflecting on that now, before deciding what to do in future. It might be an evolution of what I’ve done so far with Bekandze Farm, or it might be something very different. If you are able to find 35K USD to become a business partner in eco-agri-tourism, as a catalyst of wider change, then we’d be delighted to hear from you. 

I hope these reflections on my collapse-aware journey, with its ups and downs, might help stimulate your own reflections. If you could benefit from input on your own journey, from likeminds, then I recommend joining us in the MMI.

I will conclude this summary of my year with a mention of some key outputs on my blog, jembendell.com:

• A summary of the various key concepts in my work, from deep adaptation, to pan-ecologism, and more.
• A summary of each chapter of my book Breaking Together. 
• An FAQ on a more ecological approach to climate change, which recognises large forests and ocean health as the forefront of the near-term climate stabilisation agenda. 
• A reflection on the importance of not becoming attached to the concept of collapse in a way that then stultifies presence to what is occurring and possibilities for action. 
• A personal update on Covid-19, as the disease continues to pose serious long term consequences and is not yet being addressed in more holistic ways. 

Various other articles are available on my website, where I continue sharing every couple of weeks. 

I wish that you, and all around you, feel some deep contentment over the coming weeks,

Jem x

Calling all doomsters: in our 5th Metacrisis Meeting, on the first Monday of the month, January 5th 2026, we will explore the many ways people are growing personally and professionally because they recognise or experience a metacrisis and societal collapse.  Not despite it. We will share how we are evolving, and where we find vitality in these difficult, tragic, and sometimes depressing, times. The aim is mutual inspiration and encouragement.